"never stop doing your best, just because someone doesnt give you credit'

I have been counting the days till I am  ready to write about this.
My experience as an organizing committee president of exchange project for AIESEC bandung, last June.
I put such an effort because this is my first team leader experience.
For almost 7 weeks, I dedicated myself on this project 24/7.
I spent all my holidays to guide 17 students from 10 different countries who volunteered for the social project that I had planned for them since 3 months earlier.
3 from poland, 4 from portugal, 2 from china, 2 from egypt, 2 from malaysia, 1 from vietnam, 1 from kyrgyztan, and 2 from austria.
So, me and 5 of my committees must create a project with Healthy Lifestyle issue.Our goal is to make positive impact to the society and develop the exchange participants.
We did roadshow to a few schools and orphanages in bandung and jatinangor. The interns taught the kids about healthy food, sport, sanitary, and many more.
We conducted cooking class with elementary children. Jogging, cycling and even hiking with the kids to the mountain.
We even  visited the school for disable kids.
The interns also showcased their cultures by dancing, singing, giving presentation, and souvenirs.
I traveled to Pari Island and Kawah Putih to show them the beauty of our country.
I pretty much arrange everything for them to have the best life changing- experience.
Why i did this on the first place?
I had gone exchange with AIESEC. It's undoubtedly incredible. I want them to have the same experience as mine.
The whole project, I had missed the time with my best friends and even came to the point I got left out by them.
I was so occupied I didn't have time for my ex, I didn't even realize he was starting to "fall out of love"
I didn't mean to blame this project, he left just because he's an asshole.
I'm just haunted by "if only i knew i must sacrifice this much, maybe i wouldn't choose this"
Is this worth it?
Not to mention that this project had not always been pleasant to me.
Those exchange participants, sometimes all they did was complaining.
All they wish for was everything went perfectly.
While on the other side, I didn't get a proper education on how to run project like this.
I didn't know i will be dealing with monster. I did not have experience in this field.
My committees count on me to make decision. They're as confuse as I am.
I must take all the blame. I felt so small, like an idiot.
I know being a leader is not about being liked, but does it mean I have to be hated?
My ex was kind enough, he waited until the last day of the project to break up with me.
That day is the day i wanted to say to him "Thank you for being so patience, it's time for me to pay back".
Yet he had left, before i uttered the words.
Ironically all the time i cried to him about the project, maybe he didn't really care.
He just wanted to hang on there until the last day.
Trust me, It has been a one of the most destructive moment in my life
.
However, every cloud has a silver lining.....

I learn how to deal with different personalities and cultures. That everyone has different level of tolerance to your mistake.
I got the chance to meet inspirational people like the owner of vegetarian cafe in bandung and teachers who dedicated themselves in small school in the village in tanjung sari, sumedang ( we had to take a truck because it's up on the hill)
I get used to make fast decision when things did not go as I had planned. I learned to have plan B. which i didnt have that time.
I am trained to have strong argument and reason for every decision i made because i had to explained every detail to the interns. I learn how not to procrastinate things
I learn how to handle my stress. Working under pressure. Things can always get worse and this project must continue. Even the house they lived in was entered by a burglar.Many other organizing committee presidents had chosen to runaway, i did not.
I  gain public speaking skill, become a good translator, gave speech, and leading a meeting. even bargaining price with the angkot driver. Tour guide is my side job.
I am  overwhelmed with this international friendship.We could talk about anything from country, government, life, to even bad words. Some of them criticize me. Some appreciate me and even stand up for me.At the end, most of them applaud me for not giving up.
I acquire the skill of team- management and team-building. Me, Sera, Vivian, Ratu, Gina, and Shifa worked together and never blame each other. As a leader, I recognized their weakness and strength.
I learn to be patience. A lot of time for the littlest thing. As when my interns are angry because the water in the house is broken.
My mom and dad helped me pick up some of the interns at the airport late at night and waiting for hours. I remember how grateful i am to have such a supportive parents. And my bestfriends who still try to meet me at the slightest time that i had. they are my real one.

mostly, i learn to be brave. I learn to admit my flaws. Endeavor not to be beaten by my fear of failure. because stupid people will judge you by your first effort, but smart people will judge you by how you handle your second chance. Eventually, i take higher role as the vice director of incoming exchange unpad for term 2014/2015. My role is also to supervise 2 projects that will be ran by my staffs. so this will be my real journey. and i will not let myself down. i will learn from my mistake. i will continue to train my leadership and give the impact to the society. because seeing the face of the kids who are exciting with the foreigners are too priceless to be wasted.

life, continue to surprise me!

the ATM tale

this isn't a sad story. just a tale. an unfortunate tale with sad ending. but this isnt sad.

i was passing by the atm centre in our campus. i've passed that place a bunch of times since i was a freshmen. but this time it was different. it gives me a flashback. a real one i almost think i saw your ghost. i saw us sitting there.

that chilly night 3 months ago. we were having a bad bad phase of relationship. i did something awful and you get too ignorance about me, so for few days it had given me so many tears. i came to the time that i wanted to give up on us. but i wanted to stay as much as i wanted to leave. so i stay quiet in my tears. then you called me up and asked to me to dinner. you said you need to take your money in the atm first. so i waited for you near the atm door. i sat alone as if looking for a view but there was nothing except the dark cold night of jatinangor. you got out from the atm door and sat next to me. we stayed quiet. and it did feel warm and hurt at the same time. and i started it. i was always been that girl who thinks she needs to express everything in her mind. so i asked what was wrong with you all this time. and you explained well, though still make non sense to me. but you did look like you have no bad intention to me. and that was enough. we talked pretty long because i was hard-headed. i still couldnt get the way you sometimes didnt want to share your feelings with me. the way you need time to explain things that should've been explained right away to avoid missunderstanding. but that is just you. and i need to learn to be that person you have the urge to tell everything immediately. thus, we started to laugh because you are stupid and i love you. we started to laugh because i was self- centered and you care about me so much. we started to laugh because we've just realized that we had spent one hour in front of the atm centre talking about our relationship. we didnt even feel the chill because we were so into the conversation. it might didnt mean anything to you. but for me, it means we dont need special place. we dont need special occasion. we just need the talk. and we can be anything that we want as long as we talk.

so after now we ended without having a decent talk. i was the only one that get crashed. i was thinking to take you to the atm centre. just maybe so we can talk.

i miss talking to you. i didnt really miss you in a lover way. but you and your maturity that i get used to, having you that i can confide to. and you will reply with your wisdom and i will be hard-headed. but listen to you eventually. now that we are stranger again. it doesnt feel sad. it does feel really weird. as if the 8 months never happened. as if we're the same two person who lay each other's eye on the cafetaria 10 months ago, our first meeting. and what make it more odd to me, that i still think you're a good man. i still believe in that. even when everyone around me knows that you have done bad things to me. and you're fine with that. it doesnt hurt me that you broke our commitment. honestly it just hurt that i'm not irreplaceable to you. i know i will be replaced, but not too soon. i would ask a decent period of time to mourn. but you are with her now. because i wasnt worth it. i mean nothing. it's no longer about me being left. it's about how much you've lied when you said i mean something to you. how much i've lost all my self-esteem, how much i've lost self-appreciation. how much i've lost my appetite because i dont think myself is important. because if someone had been with me for so long and he can replace me without a guilt, doesnt it mean i'm worthless?

i'm at the lowest point. not because i lost you. because i no longer know my value for others.

so, a decent atm talk was all we ever needed.

judging ourself

happy eid-ul-fitr dear readers. this celebration is indeed full of victory for moslems, including me. but i come up a little vulnerable. not that someone let me down, maybe it's just me try to judge myself. before college, i had few bestfriends but not much of them consider me as their betsfriend, at least that's what i feel. but now gratefully i have many people who would proudly say i'm their bestfriend.

judging is a relative thing,  depend on which eyes it come from. but honestly speaking, we do compare ourself with others. we can say whether we are smarter, more beautiful, more popular, or even less sociable less talented than anyone around us. then something bother me, can we assess these things like; how good we are as a friend? how good we treated our friend? how sincere we are to our friends? and even more...how does our bestfriend feel about being our bestfriend? do you get it? we can't never really know it.

because with our bestfriend, we are ourselves. we can never fake it. and even if we're not good enough our bestfriend would end up just accept it. or if they ran away, then they're not our true one. that's innocent thinking but that's what i believe. why? because i'm that kind of person who no matter how badly my friends treat me, i will stand by her. i will be there at the end of the road when no one gives a fuck to you. i can accept if my friends arent good enough for me as long as they appreciate their life and walk in the line.

"She’s my person. If I murdered someone, she’s the person I’d call to help me drag the corpse across the living room floor. She’s my person."
— Dr. Cristina Yang - 'Drowning on Dry Land' 

that's me you would like to call

but lately i feel like i'm not good enough for them.  i cried, a lot. i just wanted anyone around me to accept me and my flaws because i believe i also have the good. but somehow they made me feel like my flaws have covered all the good things i have. that's the saddest thing for me. i know their good intention i know that they have all the rights to judged me because they know me so well. but it feels like they use what they know about me against me. i started to think that i am so bad that i dont deserve to look good in front of anyone. geez i'm so sentimental. the thing is, i dont give a fuck if people can't see my good, but these are my bestfriends. these are the most important people in my life. the one that i always sacrifice my best for. and i'm not good enough....

as if i always do something that is not right. i'm clumsy, i'm forgetful, i sometimes put my boyfriend first,  i sometimes get lazy. i'm sometimes selfish, i sometimes dont want listen to my bestfriends, i sometimes dont always tell everyone about everything because i wait for the right moment. but all the things i said above, doesn't it suppose to be mistakes everyone has at least once do to their bestfriend? but i always be honest with my bestfriends, i'm not ashamed to say how much i love my bestfriend, when anyone having a birthday trust me i'm the one that's too excited to make them happy. i care too. i dont want a reward for that.

and i never talked behind my bestfriend's back. i had a history being backstabbed by my ex-bestfriend. she told my secrets to her new friends. my sin my shameful history. but what hurts me is not the people knows how bad i am, what hurts me is that i know her fucking worst secret her shameful secret but until now that we are not bestfriend anymore, i never tell anyone. got that? that's what happen when you give your 100% and you didnt get it back. so i'm kind of sensitive when my bestfriend tell my other people what she doesnt like about me. i try not to fuss about it. but deep down, it bites me. i mean if i had something that i think is wrong from you, i would tell you. and find the solution.

i'm also that kind of person who likes to try new things. i make myself busy i find my adventure. i'm busy as hell and it's my fault that sometimes i had to put my bestfriend in the second priority. but i swear at the time they really need me, i would fucking be there for you. i can't stand in one comfort zone for too long, but i dont go find new one, i expand my comfort zone. i dont forget people that i really care about. so it's kind of make me mad when people think i forget them or even more when people forget me because they think i already forget them.

i cant say all these things to them directly. because i'm really stupid at this kind of uttering my heart. i'm good at writing. but if i say this to them i would end up being harsh and judgmental. i even wanted to cry. but my boyfriend say i could cry as much as i want but i should never judge my bestfriends. means that i believe they have a good reason for what they've done. i know. maybe one day, i'll be a good enough person for everyone, and i'll look back and thanked my friends for making me feel this way. who knows?

sorry i blabber too much, dont read this. you might not understand it because i sometimes dont understand myself as well.

The one that i've been afraid to write about

Kita tak perlu terlalu banyak uang
Kita bahagia meski tak kemana-mana
Kamu cantik (cantik) meski tanpa bedak (tanpa bedak)
Rasakan ini senang di dadaku memilikimu (memilikimu)

Satu Hari di Bulan Juni - Tulus

Hello readers, how's July treating you?
Mine is quite exhilarating. I spent the first week of ramadhan with my family. but next week i gotta stay in Jatinangor. I gotta get ready before my 'work' during holiday started. i will tell you about that later. Now i wanna talk about Arie Priatama. 

Why? why him? and why now? after 7 months of long roller-coaster relationship? you all must be confused about my title. well, yes, i have failed a few relationships before. and unfortunately, i wrote about them here. i wrote about them because i think they would fill many chapters in my life. but i had to stop writing about them after just a few pages. That's why i'm afraid and i've waited for a sometime to write about him. but now, i'm brave enough to tell about you. Not because i care about how my pages you will fill, but because in the future, i want to read back on my blog and realize how many days i've spent gratefully with you. and to make you realize, you are special for me. 

I met Kak Arie, in a cafetaria, about 8 months ago. Can i just be cheesy and say it was love at the first sight? i mean eversince that day i dont stop thinking about him. and apparently him too. so when i get the first direct message on twitter for him, we just matched clicked linked and made it somehow. He is 2 years older than me and he's a basketball player in our faculty, he's the point-maker of the game. i could say i'm glad that he's so mature. he doesnt just go doing what i want. he put me on the line. something that someone should have done to me long time ago. he wants people to see me as wonderful as i am to him. he told me to dress casually and put make up in a simple manner. he care about my style but doesnt want me to look sexy.
he teaches me to be calm in facing my problems, but i likely to be panic, and he will be there, he has  that power to calm me down. i usually cry myself out to him everytime i get too overwhelmed with my trouble. at first i have a trust issue for him regarding to his past. and that get us into trouble. he has to adapt with my childishness though, so we did break up a few times. but now we are at that point were everything makes more sense and forever is just a miles away. 
we had already been through long distance relationship when i were volunteering to Poland for 2 months. it was hard with the time differences and lack of wifi. but here we are, smiling while reminiscing those hard times. also the best part, we hang out with each other's friend. my friends totally worship him and the way he tame me. and  his friends think i'm cooler than his ex (haha! my blog, i can write what i fckn want). we hang out a lot with our companions and it has been great. 
but when it comes to the time for only us, he would tickle me, makes me sulk, and most of the time he would joke, and it's not funny, but i laugh somehow. he's so patient with me, like really, i dont want him to reply my message more that 10 minutes, i would be really angry for that. and he's such a jealous boyfriend! haha but i know it's for the sake of love. we like to talk about non sense. at night, when i lay next to him, he would be very sleepy, and i would not stop blabber, and he will reply me until he fell asleep. he's sometimes sulky though, when he's in a badmood and he doesnt want to admit it. 
Eventually, i'm so glad we had each other. There are times when we thought we werent meant to be. But i guess some things are just like magnets. They are meant to look for each other. I love you, kak!

oh and... we have the same habit! we like to squeeze people's arm. i thought i was the only person with that habit. relieved.

let me impersonate him:
"heu" (all the time with his sundanese accent)
"selamat pagi sayang"
" yang keluar deh aku udah di depan kosan kamu" (padahal masih jauh)
"ah tangan kamu ga dingin"
" jangan bete atuh yaaang ini udh aku bls kan chatnya"
" dasar tukang ngeselin tukang ngambek"
" miss you bey hihi"
" sholat bey"
" yang itu bajunya benerin"
" ih pacarku hebat "
" maaf ya bey aku gbs sweet"
" bey apatuh di bawah" (trus nyubit idung nadira ampe merah)

not yet a woman

sooo it is a birthday post again.......the sixth birthday post on this blog.
yap readers, this blog archives my moments for the last 6 years. this blog is my treasure.
however, i dont think i have the quality of a 20 years old girl. no matter how often i remind myself to grow up. i'm just me, i'm just impulsive and fickle and constantly need my loved ones to hold me. i have the quality of a gemini. i have these 2 personalities that sometimes i think logically but the other time all i want is to follow my heart. sometimes i know what i did is stupid but i still did it anyway, clumsy. sometimes i dont care what people say but the other times what they say could make me sleepless for days. that's just me. but somehow now i see people around me getting sick of me being me. the push to be mature is bigger than ever. for the sake of love, i guess? yap it's time to say goodbye to adolescence. now i'm confused, but that's why i am 20. i have a year to be confused about, before 21 22 23 and on. i even confuse if i should call myself a girl or.... a woman?

whatsoever, at first i thought i wont be too excited about the upcoming birthday. but turns out....it was the best birthday celebration ever (i always say that in every of my birthday). well, even if i'm 20 or 40. i would still love birthday surprise :) take a look!

And guess who decorate my room? with all the balloons and colored papers? my boyfriend it is :) you know, i have been through birthdays with a few different men in my life. but this time, he put all the effort to even stick the balloons on the ceiling of my room, he gathers all my friends, he brings his friends. the best present for me is his effort. knowing someone would wake up at 6 am, cutting all these papers, blowing all the balloons. i mean, not every man wants to do that. oh dear, thank you for making me special. thank you to my best friends, i'd never know i deserve this much happiness. i know my life has always been an unpredictable ride, but i really wish you all stay in my life forever and ever. at the end of the day, what makes me even happier is the fact that all my friends are also in love with my boyfriend! they all appreciate what he did. it's a big responsibility for me to keep him though. but i know, he's the right one.

I'll keep this post as a birthday post, anyway. Let's talk about my boyfriend on the next post. I'm ready for it :)

ps: thanks to Prita who comes all the way from Jakarta for me, you really surprised me, you know what i mean :) xoxo love you

dramatization, creative writing

180410120109/ Class A

Summary: Liqa is approached by 2 of her seniors at the same time.

I rushed to the gate of my faculty. I was late for my first orientation day as a freshmen in literature study. When I approached a group of students who were listening to the seniors, suddenly all eyes are on me. That was pretty awkward, especially because the seniors started to whisper and murmur. I introduced my self in a nervous manner.

“Hello all, sorry for being late….I was lost while looking for this building. My name is Aliqa Andriana and you can call me Liqa.”

“And where are you from?” the man who is standing in the front replied quickly.

“Jakarta.” One of the seniors took my photo candidly while I answered the question.

“No wonder. You can sit now” said the senior.

The following night, I sat in front of my laptop. I got friend requests on my facebook. I found out that the senior who talked to me yesterday is the senate president, Rafka. And the other who kept taking my candid photos along the day is Arvin.

“ How was the first day of orientation?” Rafka chatted me on Facebook unexpectedly.

“Well, I got a little bored because I dont know much about my new friends.” I answered bluntly.

“I can see it coming. You seemed stand out from the others. The way you dress and act are so uptown girl. But you have attracted many people.”

I was surprised by his cynical answer. It is like he is trying to give me compliment implicitly. I ended up talking to him the whole night. He is so smart and tactful. He tells me his experience with the lecturers and their subjects. He is a bit sarcastic towards everything but he has strong and valid argument. I have never been impressed by someone’s stubborness.

The next day of orientation, the freshmen are told to prepare a dress for the inauguration night. While I were laughing with my new friends, Arvin kept taking my photos with his SLR camera. I somehow felt annoyed with it, so after the meeting I talked to him.

“ Hey, I dont mean to be rude, but can you stop taking my photos?” I remarked to him

“I did it because it is my job to make documentation for this event.” He answered mildly

“Well then you supposed to take pictures of all the freshmen, not just me.” I got a little cranky because he started to laugh.

He stopped laughing when he saw me frowned. He apologised and said “Well you are the centre of attention without even trying to be. Consider that as a compliment.” That got me a little flaterred. We continued talking and he offered me a lift back to my dorm.

They both started to chat me every night. Arvin is the captain of our faculty’s football team. Besides that, he has a good skill in photography. He is modest and open- minded. He can see the good side in every problem. Everything is going on well until one night before the inauguration night, they asked to pick me up. I said no to both of them. Since Arvin kept forcing me, I said to him he could pick me home after the event.

On the inauguration night, Rafka gave the opening speech with his excellent English which make it perfect. From my seat, I could see Arvin and Rafka are talking to each other while looking at me.

“I’m gonna took you home after the event.” Rafka came to me

“What? No, it is alright. I can go home by myself.”

“No, I want to make sure you are alright.”

“ But…I already promise Arvin that he can pick me home.”

“ What? I wont let you go home with him. I have planned this event for months and I’m not gonna let you go home from here with him.” Rafka looked upset. “I’m gonna wait at the parking lot whether you come or not.” He continued

I texted Arvin eventhough we were in the same room. I could not tell him directly. I told him that I am gonna go home with Rafka. Arvin looked at me with disappointed look, but he did not say anything. I went to the dorm with Rafka. I was about to sleep,when Arvin texted me to go outside my dorm. He was there. It was 2 AM in the morning.

“ I made you a poem.” He said briefly with faceless expression.

“ Thank you…..” I took the paper he gave. I read the poem. He was waiting quietly. The poem is about a boy who was looking for the right girl. Suddenly he met this bouncy girl who turn his world upside down. Though he has a rival, he decided not to yield. He would wait until the girl gives him the answer. Neither me nor Arvin said anything afterward. He just suddenly hugged me, kissed my hand, and went away with his motorcycle.

Rafka did a lot of romantic things with me. We sat near the lake inside my university and blew the bubble together. We made airplane from paper and flew it to the sky. While Arvin was there every time I needed him. He accompanied me doing my assignment for hours until the cafe is closed. He took me to this music concert and hold my hand when the singer was singing “Selamanya Cinta” by D’Cinnamons. I am so fickle.

One month went by. Tomorrow is Rafka’s birthday. After such an unpleasant self-struggle, I have took my decision. Arvin came to my dorm as usual. I sat beside him.

“Tomorrow is Rafka’s birthday.” I said straightly

“Yes. And so what.” He replied perfuntionally

“ I have made my decision. But believe me this is not as easy as you thought it is.”

“Go on.”

“ I think it is better if we stay as a friend. You brought so much fun in my life. But I feel more like myself when I was with Rafka. That’s a hard truth but I gotta stop making you wait. This girl before you is not the partner you are looking for. I am a fool.”

“ Well, I gotta prove that you were a fool for doing this.” There’s a silence and he went on“I gotta stay away from you for a while. I cant promise you a friendship though.”

“I expected you to be angry. That way my guilty would be decreased. I’m sorry.” That was the last thing I said before he went away.

An hour before Rafka’s birthday, he took me out for a walk. We were walking to our favorite cafe when suddenly he closed my eyes with a piece of crape.

“Rafka, stop being silly. What are you doing?” I asked spontaneously.

“Just follow me. Be careful with your step.” He answered happily. He lead me to his motorcycle and we both went somewhere with it. We arrived and he lead me for another few steps. He opened the black scrape. It was the lake, our favorite place. It was dark and the only light is the candles that surrounded me. The candles made a heart shape. He was standing outside the candles.

“Look at your watch. My birthday is 3 minutes from now. Please took one of the candles and blew it if you are willing to be my girlfriend. But if no, just stepped out from the candles.” He instructed. I had the night that every girl has dreamed of. I took a few steps. I took the candle and blew it.

Thanks to Arie Priatama, Ananda Fitriana (180410120118/Class A),Adhiatmaka Baskara (180410120076/Class A), Maulia Sefriani (Class B), Nurul Undira Eka Putri (class A) who proofread my short prose

Word Count : 1122

summer is here

Hai I'm gonna write about my quick getaway to Bali. About 2 weeks ago me, kiki, prita, and alyani flew to Bali. we stumbled upon cheap tickets and apparently we have free schedule. So why not?  The best plans are the one that come unplanned.
On Friday afternoon, we departed from Hussein Sastranegara Airport in Bandung. Arriving at Risata Hotel in Tuban area, it is pretty far from any other famous areas. We shared one room together and make a huge mess immediately on our first get-dressed-for-the-night session. We went to Motel Mexicola for dinner. apparently we stopped at the main street of seminyak and got stucked on traffic. so we walked pretty far to the restaurant. I love the vibe of the place! First of all, the color is dominated with turquoise! they played mexican songs which are very energetic. Everyone seems having fun laughing out loud and drunk a lil bit, some are wearing sombrero. Such a happy place. I ordered the nachos and quesadillas. some of the bule attempted to talk us. fun night. we dropped in to mcdonald in kuta. it was like, who doesnt need mcdonald after all????

The next morning we had breakfat at Nasi Pedes Bu Andika. It is pretty famous, cheap, and crowded. But for me, the taste is somewhat standard. Our first destination is Padang- Padang Beach. the trip took 1 hour to Uluwatu. people said we have to go down hundred of stairs. the fact is it only a few stairways. I love the combination of sands, sea water, and coral reef! Not so many people and the wave is so friendly though the sun was so hot. we rented the umbrella and laying on the beach laughing taking pictures and singing. i have the best girls in the world, haven't i? We intended to go to El Cabron to watch sunset but it was full somehow. So we spend the rest of the afternoon at Finn's Beach Club. It is private beach and each person has to pay 250k rupiah. we already got food, towel, bed, and umbrella. The place is so peaceful. gentle breeze and vague songs completed the day. we went down to the sea and screamed to the strong wave. i almost felt asleep because it does feel like our own beach. For the dinner, we went to Rock Bar in Jimbaran. The restaurant hung in a high cliff facing the sea. We must took the elevator to go down and the elevator is open air and i was so scared of height i almost can't breath. The place is a lil too pricey and because it's 7 pm so we barely can see anything. the light is too dim.

We had breakfast at this small restaurant in the roadside of Seminyak called Sea Circus. The decoration is so cute and again, dominated with turquoise and white colors. The food is cheap and the milkshake is superb. whatever, turquoise just make me happy. On the third day, we visited potato head beach club. we intended to swim in the pool but it was full. hence we only had our lunch and sat on the green grass. it was a pretty good time because the sea breeze are so fresh. we then went earlier to El Cabron because we want to get place near the swimming pool. We pay 300k rupiah each person for the table on the poolside including the food and the towel. They gave us the best sunset view ever while swimming and eating. The pool is small but it is located over the cliff facing to the sea. We stayed there for like 3 hours. Before going back to hotel, we strolled at Kuta Street for shopping. And then we went to Krishna to buy souvenirs. I love it better when i dont have to bargain price.

The last day we woke up early to packed all the mess. We bought something at Joger shop, it is a famous brand from Bali. they had funny sentences on their stuff. We had our last lunch at KuDeTa. the restaurant is at seminyak beach and i can hear the sound of the wave while eating. It is a pretty hot day though. they also have beds for sunbathing and swimming pool but of course we didnt intend to get tan like those bule. finally we have to go back to where we belong; college and tasks. whatsoever, i have the best summer. the one that come spontaneously and hilariously well spent. i had deep talks with the girls along with the stupid talks. we talked about life but we dont have to talk about how we're gonna stand up for each other's because we knew it already. after having been to so many beautiful places, i realize that what makes it perfect is not what you're wearing or going, but who you're with.
so let me have a little closure, this journey wouldn't be as great as it is without the girls. cheers!

super late update

Hai! awkay i know how lame this post could be. i have promised you to continue my story about the europe trip i had 2 months ago. but really this 4th semester is choking me. it's like my brain is literally drained out because all the assignments are getting serious (where have i been for the first 1,5 year???) thus, so i'll make a brief end to my last post.

the third day on paris, we went to the airport early in the morning. and we bought ticket to go back to berlin on the afternoon. yap this trip is unplanned and random but that's the art of travelling, isnt it? since we only had a few hours, we decided to see eiffel tower one more time. we relax in the park, looking at the tower,ate crepes, observed the the cute children, and had the best afternoon of our life. only i wish it was less cold and windy. we caught our flight back to the airport, and i literally run because we miss the boarding time. gosh. nevertheless, next time i'm in paris i'll make sure to get inside louvre and notre dame church. au revoir france!

 we arrived in berlin late at night and we stopped by at mikhail''s friends. and the weird coincidence is, turns out two of them are my old friends from high school. such a small world. indonesian students in here are very friendly they even cooked me eggs with rice and soy sauce. nothing beats indonesian foods! later, we stroll to our motel at 1 am in the morning and i was freezing and super tired but i never lost my excitement.
the next morning, we stroll around berlin. this city is the most advanced of all. they have all the transportation so well organized. from metro, tram, bus, regular train, and fast train. i went from one station to another station. the city is so alive though it was winter, really different with poland. i went shopping at this department store named Primark at alexandre platz. everything is so cheap and tempting! i almost bought everything. i also visited the moslem prayer place for indonesian people. the place is actually an apartment room but they renovate it into a comfortable and clean place for praying. they also sell indonesian food. i'm so proud and feel like home. in the afternoon then i took a train to Kuthen. i stayed one more night in my ayu's house. before sleep, me mikhail and ayyu sat on the dining room and we had conversation about everything. i love that moment. i got so curious about their life in germany. i started asked and never get satisfied. i miss them :(

 in the morning, we hurried back to berlin. me and ayyu were dragging my 2 big suitcases to station which somewhat far. suddenly, there's a car stopped and offer us a lift. he helped us put the suitcase on the car. he is a teacher in college. he knows we are students and that's why he helped us. what a gentleman! unfortunately he couldn't speak english well. later we save my suitcase in the storage room at the station. and we had another day to stroll around in berlin. we had lunch at the famous indonesian restaurant 'Nusantara' i ate opor ayam and cendol! oh i'm beyond happy. i met ayyu and mikhail's other friends. of course we talked in indonesian and laugh so hard because no one understand but us haha. i started to feel so familiar and i notice why my friends never seemed homesick. i, my self, am in love with the city. i wish i could live there someday. later at night, we went to the famous Brandenburg gate. it was triumphant. beautiful monument. we sat in starbucks and enjoyed my last night. i didnt have a chance to visit madam taussad, so it means i gotta comeback someday haha. i slept on the house of ayyu's bestfriend whom i have just known for one day. i really feel like an adventurer! from one house to another, from one new friend to another. but really, meeting people with same nationality in another country has its own relief. my flight was the first on the next morning. mikhail and ayyu took me to the airport. i was crying on our way, blame them for making me feel so comfortable around:( thank you mikhail and ayyu. you both are the best travel mate ever. and i know i've been such a burden but you both never complain. much love <3 p="">

Then i continued my journey to Norway. So, i have an aunt whom married with Norwaygian. She has lived there for many years with her husband and two of my cousins. I flew with norweygian airlines and they have free wifi inside the plane! like how cool it was! my first time ever. Norway is much colder because it's near the north pole. it's snowing pretty thick around my aunt's house. we ate together and my aunt cooked me spicy fried rice. haha how happy i am  i hadn't ate any chilies for 7 weeks.the european really hates spicy food. geez. afterward, i made a snow lamp with my older cousin, Tanita. she is in her 3rd year of college. she is very nice and her english is excellent thanks god. she told me her experience conquered the nerve disease that made her almost can't walk. for your info, this is my first time playing with the snow because in poland the snow is to thin. happy kid i am! the next day i stroll to the mall. everything in norway is so effin expensive. i dont think i could afford anything without my aunt. i mean, it's overpriced for a tourist like me. no surprise they dont have many tourists. for example, 1 box of tea cost 80.000 rupiah and a bar of chocolate could reach 100.000 rupiah.and because my aunt's house is the suburban. so the next day me, auntie, tanita, and andreas took the bus to oslo. we ate ben and jerry's ice cream in winter! we visited the vigeland park (they have naked statues all over the garden) and the castle.  i saw a very beautiful ice skate rink in the middle of the city. norway is neat and rich. everything has a system. they have 13 years of regular school. and everyone can get a loan from the government to continue to university. the people are so pampered. but they preserved their nature. the trees and forest are so beautiful along the way. and i can't stop eating because they have the best chocolate ever!!! moreover my aunt cooked oreo cheeseke for after dinner. this entire journey has made me gain 5 kilos. gosh! before i went to sleep, my aunt gave me 50 euros to spend. what a surprise! lol. early in the morning, my uncle drove me to the airport. i spent the journey with my aunt's friend. he is by another coincidence shared the same plane with me. so exhilarated that i have another indonesian companion. He's an old man, he married with norwaygian woman and has 4 daughters.


I had a lot of experience with stranger in this adventure. in fact, this journey i spent mostly with people i've just met once or have barely seen for years. my host fam (alisja and kryztof, and matthew), my roomate alexandra, another interns (dasha, nugra, marco, rheza, rimon), the aiesecer poland (ewelyna, david, marta), the teachers in kindergraten (anya, agatha), alisja's family, the stranger that help me and alisja when our car broke down in front of the station one day. he drove us home. so nice. also the stranger lady in the train in paris who helped me fix my broken bag. and another indonesian students whom i met in praha and berlin and paris. we have just met once but we have this bond that i dont think i can make with any strangers i'd met in indonesia. this journey is wonderful because i open up to these people and to many possibilities. i dont let anything stop my curiousity and happiness does come from knowing new things. i realize the world that i lived in is only a small chunk of the entire planet. eventually, after spending 14 hours of journey (plus 6 hours transit in doha), i arrived sound and safe at soekarno hatta airport. my mom even cried when she saw me.

well, the 7 weeks journey all alone across the ocean miles away doing something i never knew i could. i have stepped poland, praha, austria, slovakia, germany, france, italy, and norweygia. i have the ups and downs. i had gone through time when i miss home so badly, when i started depressed because i couldnt understand the language people are saying, when i feel so lonely. but also i experience the time when i become bestfriend with the strangers. i feel like can count on them. i started to like and be familiar with my environment. moreover i met other indonesians and saw beautiful places. i'll never be the same Nadira. I have changed a lot eversince. even a little piece of me wish i didnt have to comeback to where i belong. ironic i know. my suggestion is if you wanna know yourself and what you want in life, go! see and travel the world. meet strangers and share your experience with them. you'll find yourself in the proccess of discovering. especially when you are staying at a motel and share a room with a few strangers. what a precious experience!

thank you aiesec, for this priceless experience. thank you mom and dad for letting me and trusting me. thank you arie priatama who encourage me before and during the process, and dear god, you know this is the best gift i could ever get.