everybody's changing

while other people busy complaining everybody in their life is changing i just likely admit that ' i do change too' a lot. human 's life just supposed to be that way, revolving. high school change me in a particular way, though it has only been 2 years. i become more expressing about who am i. i no longer want people to label me as 'sweet girl' i'm bad, i'm clumsy, i'm an attention seeker. when i was in private school, everyone talking behind everyone's back and so i used to be so down when people mocking at me. but entering public school everyone is just so 'honestly straight ahead'  i no longer vulnerable when people insult me. it gets me stronger. realize, getting used to it doesnt mean i should just stay quiet on the corner. i show people i'm bigger than what they have accused to me. and i did it, silent is golden action is diamond. no offense but well maybe if i get children i will put them on public school.

other case, i'm now make friends with boys. that's a 'wow' for me. i used to envy and sometimes disgust a girls who surrounded by boy friends. It never make sense for me. how can it be? what topic we should talk about? what should we do when we hang out? but now i get the answer, simply just treat them the same way like your girlfriends and simply dont add special feeling. just pure friend. earlier, i could never imagine would hang out with boys i used to think it is too 'dangerous' but it happens and i like it! espcially my  current classmates...ah i love them so much!

i change the way i am in relationship too. i've learnt a lot from the former one. at the present i just being 'nothing to lose' i used to be so high demanding but now i try to let it flow and more understanding. sometimes i look back and i hate the way i was as a girlfriend. i realise sometimes we dont always have to get what we want, sometimes people know better what we really need, especially people who love you, they surely want best for you. so i want to be less selfish, less cranky and more patience more respect for my boyfriend. i dont want to change him the way i want him to be, i want him the way he want it to be. as the cliche said '24hours ready for you'  

 

it's one month anniversary with you tomorrow. i love you marsya